Mom Monday: Allison- Why this first time mom is choosing a natural birth.

I am humbled at the opportunity to write for this blog! These seasoned moms can tame a teething toddler with one hand behind their backs, and leap loads of laundry in a single bound! Their thoughts and advice have helped me navigate the every more confusing world of the new mom.

I don’t love the distinction “crunchy”, but I plan on providing my daughter with a very natural environment in which to grow.  I want to breastfeed for at least a year, I have a baby bullet and I’m not afraid to use it, and Iam planning on a non-medicated birth. For our family, natural is almost always better. We make our own bread and avoid processed foods because as they say, you are what you eat, and I want to build my body (and this baby!) with the best building blocks possible.

Natural birth is something that is fairly new to my “mommy plan”, however. I have never even broken a bone, and I’m what many people would call a wuss when it comes to pain. I was always in the “drug me until I feel nothing” camp of thinking until it came time to actually plan a birth for this baby. I have gone more natural in the past few years with my food and personal care, but the idea of a natural birth was still really, really scary to me. They say this is the worst pain on earth, right? People used to die doing this all the time, right? How can anyone do it without medicine!?

So, like any first-born female with a business degree, I did what I do best… I took control! I did hoards of research; I watched “The Business of Being Born”, read up on The Bradley Method, looked up real natural birth videos and consumed every other form of media I could on the topic of natural birth.

One common theme in all of these pieces struck me… the women were calm, collected, in-control and dare I say peaceful. Sure, they still seemed to be in pain, but these birth experiences were nothing like “A Baby Story” or “Knocked Up” where the women scream, demand pain meds, and break their partners’ fingers from gripping so hard. These moms seemed prepared, if that is even possible, even if it was their first baby. Their partners, too, seemed more collected than the pacing, panicked fathers I had seen portrayed in countless “traditional birth” scenarios. My mind was made up, that is what I want!

I know that once we get into the delivery room, all bets are off, but I love the idea of being fully educated and prepared for what my body and baby will most likely go through. Instead of fearing birth, I am actually excited for the experience now! It is thrilling to imagine going through something so powerful and life-changing with my husband as an ally every step of the way. I don’t want to miss a single facet of that experience, and that includes the pain.

I have faith that my body was perfectly designed for this process. Our bodies are amazing! Women are warriors, with the power of life built into our beings. With the right training and passion, I really think that I can do this! Not only that I can do it- that I was made to do exactly this.

My husband, of course, is a key supporter in this process. I’ve been told that the right partner in birth is paramount to your success. My wonderful husband is so many things that I am not. He is cool-headed, patient, and flexible. He also loves to read, research and prepare. Best of all, he actually is a coach! Not a labor coach, but he is familiar with the idea of a “game plan” with different strategies to be used in scenarios that might come our way during the course of “the game”, or in our case, labor! He is just as excited about this birth as I am, and that is so important. I have no doubt that he will read my “Bradley” book cover to cover, and master the partner skills needed to assist me in this huge undertaking. Between his calming influence and support, and my determination and strength… we’ve got this!

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I also trust my doctor completely to advise me in the event that things do not go as planned. Without her supportive guidance, I doubt I would have the confidence I do in completing a drug-free birth. My doctor is open, down-to-earth and not condescending at all, and I really do see her as an ally. She patiently takes the time to explain options, and the pros and cons to every facet of a decision. Unlike the pushy image painted of doctors today, she has actually been key in building my confidence. Put simply… she doesn’t treat me like an idiot! My doctor has empowered me throughout pregnancy so far, and I have no doubt she will continue to do so through the birth process.

I am truly surrounded with the most amazing team of supportive people. They have helped transform me from a scared first-time-mommy who flinches at the word “labor” to a woman who cannot wait to experience birth for the first time. Yeah, it is going to hurt… a lot! But I am ready. I think every woman deserves to feel like this! Whatever your birth plan might be, I hope that your team supports and empowers me the way my husband and doctor have. Do your research- find out what you really want out of the birth process. Natural birth is not for everyone, but I know it is for me, and I can’t wait!

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9 Responses to “Mom Monday: Allison- Why this first time mom is choosing a natural birth.”

  1. Brieanne
    November 4, 2013 at 8:17 pm #

    Dude, you can do it and there is no harm in trying! I gave birth without drugs and I would say the best piece of advice I received is this: up until this point in life, pain always is bad. You have hurt yourself in some way. With birth, pain is positive–it is just your body preparing to do what it is meant to do! You need to submit and think of the pain as positive steps towards the end goal of meeting your baby. And don’t be disappointed if you end up with drugs or a c–own your birth, however it comes about. Check out the hypnobirthing book by Marie someone I think? I promise it’s not as new-agey as it sounds and it was super helpful as far as mindset goes.

  2. Xza
    November 4, 2013 at 8:31 pm #

    You’ve got this!

  3. Anne
    November 4, 2013 at 8:35 pm #

    This sounds a lot like me when I was pregnant with my son. Unfortunately, I did not get the natural birth I had hoped for. The best piece of advice I can give is to try to be at peace no matter what happens, and don’t be afraid to change the plan at ANY point.
    I wanted to carry as long as necessary, go into labor naturally, and have a water birth. My body and baby had a different plan. After 91 hours of labor I delivered via c-section. Turns out baby was posterior and stuck in my pelvis. I still struggle with the feelings of failure. I’m still not at peace with it. I hope you get your beautiful natural birth and it is everything you’re hoping for! :-)

  4. kelly
    November 4, 2013 at 9:13 pm #

    You have the right attitude about unmedicated vaginal birth. “Birthing from within” is an excellent book about birthing and compliments any other style and method of birthing. I just had my second unmedicated, uncomplicated vaginal birth 8 weeks ago and it was amazing. Trusting your body is the best thing you can do for yourself. Remember, It’s called labor for a reason; it’s hard work, it hurts and it’s tiring, but you can get through it, it always passes. Good luck!

  5. Brit
    November 5, 2013 at 4:40 am #

    With your mindset and the support of your spouse you can do it! I went through 24 hour of labor, 12 hours of consistent contractions and no pain meds,it was exhausting however it was the most amazing experience ever and I would do every minute of it all over again!

    However breast feeding was a much tougher battle, it is REALLY HARD, I went back to work after 5 weeks and this is when many women give up, but after many nights of 3 hours of sleep I made it 6 months exclusively breast feeding and my son is still nursing 13 months later.

    Good luck you will do great!

  6. Carrie
    November 5, 2013 at 9:37 am #

    Just make sure to love yourself, your spouse, and your baby, no matter how you deliver. And don’t be too critical of yourself if you end up screaming and demanding pain meds. I was begging for an epidural (turns out I was in transition), and during pushing I screamed loudly enough to be the talk of the postpartum ward, as well as seriously hurting the hands of my nurse with my death grip. I was embarrased at first, but I can look back now and smile about it. (Of course, I had pitocin, but no pain meds, and that can make a bit of a difference!)

  7. D
    November 5, 2013 at 11:37 pm #

    I am such a wimp when it comes to getting hurt. Everyone thought I was crazy and must be joking about having a natural birth. I did it! And I firmly believe if I can, anyone can! Good luck! You got this! And most importantly, if it gets overwhelming or doesn’t go as planned just know you did your best and the end result is what really matters. :)

  8. Z
    March 27, 2014 at 8:57 am #

    I would just like to follow this up by saying Little Miss Natural Childbirth ended up having an elective c-section. What a hypocrite.

  9. Not Impressed
    April 13, 2014 at 12:08 pm #

    This should be taken down. This mother chose to have an elective cesarean at 40 weeks and without due cause. We all get impatient. Not attempting labor after a healthy pregnancy or waiting for a child to be fully ready to greet the world is a cop out. This is not the kind of role model we need for our fellow pregnant readers

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