I have 3 little girls and
a grown boy a husband. He goes to work, he provides for his family, he plays with the kids, he kinda disciplines and he is really good at being a royal pain in my ass. I am often times really impressed with my own restraint when it comes to NOT killing him. Trust me if there was a face palm emoji it would be my best friend at the moment! I am fairly certain if they intense amount of love I feel for this man didn’t outweigh the intense amount of A$5JK$INGKNK I feel for him, his quality of life would be so different.
I love him and I love him a ton or else he would probably spend the rest of his days living in the garage with his ridiculous scooter. I often times wonder “Is it just me??” or does every women marry a man that has a child buried deep inside? I mean geez man…. How. Many. Effing. Times do I need to remind someone to pay their ambulance bill? Wanna know why we even have an ambulance bill? Because this dude flipped the car on it’s side…IN THE FRONT YARD! (ok not technically but really close). If you look up SMH in the Urban Dictionary you may just find a picture of that moment in our lives in there.
Thanksgiving is a big day at our house and this year I was required to work the day before. He forgot to take the turkey out to thaw after we had a full-blown conversation about it! (Enter purple mean face with horns emoji). It really sucks when you are in charge of dinner, clean up and kids huh? Our entire house would burn down if I was gone. TO THE GROUND.
I tend to be a somewhat, high stressed individual and that stress turns to pissed really fast. I have little to no restraint and zero tolerance for BS. I see the moment when my bitching turns into the woooooont woooont sound from Charlie Brown. He actually has a term for it… “Charlie Browning”. He swears he never does it to me but I seriously doubt it. This makes me see red especially in the middle of an argument. Like I want to NINJA kick
** Ok in all seriousness… I love and adore my husband, I truly do. I am just at my wits end here. Does anyone else have a husband that really knows how to drive them batty?! Tell me funny shit they do to make me feel better!