Zoelie Says The Darndest Things!


Allister has been slower than her sister to start using verbal language. She is 21 months old and just started saying words. Her current vocabulary consists of not much more than the following: Mom, Dad, Bee (Blanket), Meme (Minnie), Ni –Ni (good night), Bay (baby), feuh-fyies (French fries.. whoops), App (apple),  Wawa (water),  Potty, Poop, Sissy, Shoe, Sock, Diaper, Yes, no, and Bahh (bath). Plus animal sounds. We are really proud of her because 95% of these have only come about in the last couple of weeks. She never said mom until after 18 months old, never even a “ma-ma-ma-ma” babble.

Needless to say, it has been really hard to wait for her to start talking! Most of her communication has been through sign language, pointing, and grunting. Other toddlers similar in age have been speaking a lot more. I am so impatient to have our first verbal conversation! Last August we had her evaluated for a speech delay, but because she was so ahead on her motor skills we were told not to worry. They told us that one day she would just start speaking—which is what we have been witnessing. It  is so amazing to hear her sweet little voice as she learns to talk! She actually just put her first two sentences together, “Uh-oh, shoe!” and “I poop potty.” We are really looking forward to the next amazing stage when little ones start saying the funniest things.


I have talked in the past about how different my girls are. Unlike Allister, Zoelie started talking very early.  Her first word besides Dada and Mama was (ironically) “Tattoo” at 10 months old. She has always been precocious and very much ahead of the game with language. I can’t wait to hear the silly things that Allister will say, but for now I wanted to share with you some of the hilarious things that have come out of Zoelie’s mouth!

(Z in the backseat)
“Hey Dad? My legs feel like I got bitten by a deer… But good thing I didn’t!”

(After I complimented her on her outfit..)
“I’m fashionable because that’s how God made me! “

(Z to her friend sleeping over in the other room)
Z, “We can’t lay in my tent because we aren’t married. But one day God has a special boy and I’ll marry him!”
G-,”You can marry me! I like you!”
Z “I don’t want to marry you. “
G (sad voice) “Why not?”
Z”Because we are best friends. You can marry a different girl!”
G ”Oh okay, goodnight.”

(Z protesting bed time and crying…)
” I don’t want to be in my room all alone.. I think there is gonna be Eskimos!”

(Z singing in her room)
“Mary had a little lamb, little lamb little lamb and his name was Jesuuuuuuuuuus.”

(Z to a lady using a motorized cart at the store)
“Hey! I like your car!”

(At Noodles and Co. waiting in line to order lunch)
Daddy “I love butter noodles!”
Me “I like spaghetti and meatballs.”
Z “ I love Rapunzel.”

(Z has known most of the bones in our bodies from a young age, as a result of having a nurse for a grandma.
At this particular moment, she is holding her newborn baby sister.
“Awww look at her cute little phalanges!”

(I put some expensive lotion on my face as Z is watching me. She asks for some, I give her a tiny bit and put it away…)
“Mommy, can I have some more? I want to put it on my frontal bone. Please mommy? For my frontal bone? “

(A was around 6m and would imitate us sticking our tongues out at her. Z watched it happen for the first time and exclaimed..)
“Alli! You are such a genius!!!”


(A had a huge blowout in her diaper, messing up a really cute outfit.  Z was about 3.5 years old)
“A,  you really shouldn’t poop in your diaper so much, it’s not a good thing. But don’t worry, we can still be friends.”

(Z, gazing at newborn A, says…)
“Wow, isn’t she a beaut??”

(Pregnant with Alli, and Zoelie is getting rough…)
“Z, please don’t jump on me, I have acid reflux.”  Z says  “Acid reflux? Is that Spanish for puke?”

 (Introducing Zoelie to a little girl)
“Zoelie, this is Olivia. She’s 4, just like you!”
Zoelie- “Yeah and she picks her nose like me too!”

(Uncle Mike was giving Z swim lessons and she was ultra-cranky and dramatic. Uncle Mike was holding her OUT of the water…)
Mike said “Z what are the rules?” (They were stay calm, be positive, and no whining.)
Z screamed,  “I don’t know!”
Mike said, “Are you calm?”
Z said “No, I’m drowning!”


(Laying down on the asphalt looking at the sky at age 3…)
“Everywhere all the time is my favorite place to be!”

(Z recently talking on the phone to her aunt and uncle who were driving through AZ)
Auntie Lauren said “Zoelie, we are in the middle of the desert!”
Z said “No way!! That is so awesome! Are you thirsty??”
Auntie Lauren told her they were a little thirsty.
Z said, “Maybe you should have packed a water bottle,  that could save your life”.


Maybe some of these you had to be there for, but when I read through them, I crack up! Sometimes being a mom is SO much fun! These moments are treasures to me. I wish I remembered and wrote down every time something funny has been said. What are some of the funny things that your kids have said? Post them in the comments below, I’d just love to hear them!






  1. Shelley Payton -  March 8, 2013 - 4:41 pm

    Hahahaha oh thank you for sharing these, how cute! You should start a little notebook and write this stuff down, he will love it someday!

    My favorites that my kids have said:

    Enola when she was about 3 and prone to picking stuff on the ground… I told her to never ever pick up cigarette butts because they’re icky. The next time we were outside she told her daddy: Daddy don’t ever touch of those cigarettes because people PUT THEM IN THEIR BUTTS!

    My son Asher just the other day:
    A – Mommy do you have a job?
    Me – Not anymore I stay home with you.
    A – Do you want me to go do your job?
    Me – I don’t think you’d like it very much.
    A – Yeah I would, I would just do it until I didn’t like it anymore and then I would go home.

    Hahaha 🙂

  2. Heather P. -  March 8, 2013 - 5:02 pm

    So cute! I have too many to remember right now except this one. I just had baby #2 and am EB her my almost 3 year old son said “You have milk in there!? I want chocolate milk too!” 😉

  3. Janny Lee -  March 8, 2013 - 5:40 pm

    How about the time when a two and a half year old Z said “you got a big belly dont ya?” To big uncle Dave, and was the exact thing you said to him at the same age!

  4. Jessica -  March 8, 2013 - 5:55 pm

    (Laying down on the asphalt looking at the sky at age 3…)
    “Everywhere all the time is my favorite place to be!”

    This is actually my favorite thing ever!! <3

  5. Angela -  March 8, 2013 - 9:40 pm

    “Everywhere all the time is my favorite place to be!”

    Sounds like it came from a Dr. Seuss book! Adorable. It would be a great tattoo. 🙂

    • Laney -  March 8, 2013 - 9:44 pm

      Actually a friend of mine got it as a tattoo, Angela! I want to also after this baby is evicted 😉

  6. DebZ -  March 8, 2013 - 11:29 pm

    Awwwwwwwwww…..this is all so awesome! …very bright and beautiful children you have!!!!!!!!

  7. Shavon -  March 12, 2013 - 2:27 pm

    Love the swimming story! Too funny!
    We have a running joke in our house about farts giving you pink eye…anyway one day our little family was walking around target and my son was punching my husband in the butt repeatedly so DH said to DS you better stop that…well he didn’t so DH farted basically in DS’s face…we all laughed and then about 30 seconds later Rebel said “oh great now I’m gonna get pink eyes!” Super dramatically!!!!
    We couldn’t stop laughing after that!

  8. Sequoia -  March 27, 2013 - 3:25 am

    Hmmm Elias hasn’t had many funny sentences but his actions and facial expressions are the zinger lol… just today he was yelling mooooom pleaseee I find him sitting criss cross in the bathroom sink and was too scared to get out lol

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